


It is what it is

by mckvch (RaiseYourVoice)



Series: Extended Scenes & Fix-Its [2]
Category: Shadowhunters (TV), The Bane Chronicles - Sarah Rees Brennan & Cassandra Clare & Maureen Johnson, The Mortal Instruments Series - Cassandra Clare
Genre: Character Death, Episode: s01e08 Bad Blood, Extended Scene, Gen, Simon's death, Vampire Turning
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-22
Updated: 2017-01-22
Packaged: 2018-09-19 05:24:16
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,263
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9420536
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RaiseYourVoice/pseuds/mckvch
Summary: When Simon finally managed to choke out a word, two broken syllables, it took Raphael a brief moment to understand what the other was saying.Clary, the red headed new Shadowhunter. The annoying, short one that Simon was friends with."I can bring you to her but I'm not sure you'll make it until then," Raphael mumbled, grief and guilt growing in his chest and spreading through his body. He had never wanted for this to happen and for this boy to suffer the same fate as he himself had to live with for eternity. If bringing Simon to his friend would bring him at least a tiny bit of solace and would be able to ease the fear of dying at least a little, Raphael would grant the boy this one last wish. He knew Simon wouldn't make it, wouldn't survive this night. The sun would rise in a few hours but whatever the outcome of tonight, it was safe to say that Simon would never again bear witness to the sun enveloping the city in her golden warmth.





	

**Author's Note:**

> People have been talking about how Simon must have died in Raphael's arms seeing as one of his arms was draped around Raphael's neck (if you pick up an unconscious/dead person, why would their arm be around you?) so I was too tempted to write a scene like this.
> 
> I didn't quite know how to rate or tag this but I thought rating it mature might have been the better option. It's not really explicit but still...

Raphael should have expected the sight awaiting him because there wasn't really much that could have caused the smell of fresh mundane blood and the frantic little pants like someone who couldn't breathe properly than an actual mundane being hurt. He had warned the mundane boy off, had tried to get him to stay away from the hotel and Camille and it was painful to realise that he had failed.

The boy - Simon, if he recalled correctly - was sprawled on the floor behind the ugly golden couch in a position that looked unnatural and weirdly twisted. The side of his neck was smeared with blood even though the puncture wounds had already closed thanks to the healing properties of a vampire's saliva. Simon's breathing was shallow, sucking in air with panicked movements of his chest, choking ever so often because his throat was trying to close up with the pain and fear coursing through his weakened body.

Raphael was by his side in a matter of seconds, kneeling down and almost flinching away when he reached out to touch the boy's shoulder and got a scared, pained little sound in return. Simon's eyes were dark and unfocused, his glasses crooked and partly broken, and Raphael almost felt like his heart was beating rapidly against his own ribs even though it hadn't done so for decades.

"Por qué vuelves, estúpido mundano," Raphael muttered, not quite making it sound like a question because he knew Simon couldn't answer him anyway. He wasn't even sure if the boy really noticed his presence despite reacting to his light touch. Raphael didn't need to breathe but he still felt like the almost palpable fear radiating off of Simon in waves was suffocating him just like the sickness that spread through the other's body was doing to him. This was what he had wanted to prevent but he should have known Camille would find a way despite his efforts.

Simon made little choking sounds, broken noises as if he wanted to talk but was unable to form the words, his body spasming while trying to fight against the effect of the bite but Raphael knew there was no use. He couldn't do anything to stop this or to help the boy, he could only be here and keep him company, to not let him die alone but he couldn't take the pain or anguish away.

When Simon finally managed to choke out a word, two broken syllables, it took Raphael a brief moment to understand what the other was saying. _Clary_ , the red headed new Shadowhunter. The annoying, short one that Simon was friends with.

"I can bring you to her but I'm not sure you'll make it until then," Raphael mumbled, grief and guilt growing in his chest and spreading through his body. He had never wanted for this to happen and for this boy to suffer the same fate as he himself had to live with for eternity. If bringing Simon to his friend would bring him at least a tiny bit of solace and would be able to ease the fear of dying at least a little, Raphael would grant the boy this one last wish. He knew Simon wouldn't make it, wouldn't survive this night. The sun would rise in a few hours but whatever the outcome of tonight, it was safe to say that Simon would never again bear witness to the sun enveloping the city in her golden warmth.

Raphael felt the ache of a lost life resonate in his chest and all of this was way too familiar, even though he didn't actually remember his own turning. He only remembered walking into the hotel with his friends to hunt the vampire and then waking up incredibly thirsty, with blood sticking to his clothes, hands, mouth. He would never forget the first taste of human blood, even though it was a few decades ago. Raphael shook off the memories and focused on the task at hand because there was no time for him to re-live his own personal hell right now.

He was careful not to hurt Simon when he scooped the boy up in his arms, cradling the weak, broken body to his chest and wishing he could have done more. Simon whimpered with every jostle and somehow managed to lift one arm, curling it around the back of Raphael's neck to press closer against him, unconsciously seeking human contact and body heat that the vampire couldn't offer. Simon was shaking - from the pain, fear, the effects of the bite or cold, Raphael couldn't tell but it was probably a mix of them - and his still warm breath fanned over the other's neck with ever frantic little breath.

"I'm sorry," Raphael breathed even though he knew the words meant nothing, that they wouldn't save Simon or take away the terror he was feeling. He moved as quickly as possible without causing the boy even more agony, leaving the hotel behind and rushing in the direction of the Institue, inwardly praying for the redhead to be there. Despite knowing that Simon only had a few more minutes to live, Raphael still hoped he would hang on long enough to see his friend once more, to maybe say goodbye.

He himself never got the chance to say goodbye. Sure, Magnus had helped him and made it possible to go visit his family a few times but Raphael still wished he would have properly said goodbye to his loved ones before becoming _this_. Seeing the face of his mother probably would have helped to be less scared of what had been happening to him.

Raphael looked down at the boy when the other's body curled in a little more, the arm around his neck tightening when another wave of pain caused Simon's body to convulse and shudder, accompanied by more panting and whimpering.

He only noticed that he had started to hum a Spanish children's song when the body in his arms actually relaxed the tiniest bit. It was a nursery rhyme his mother had always sung to him in the evening, to help him fall asleep. And Raphael had sung it to his younger brothers later. It had always managed to get them to calm down from playing before bed and had even helped them after having a nightmare. He knew Simon was currently stuck in the worst nightmare imaginable and that falling asleep would mean never waking up again - at least not as a mundane - but maybe the song could manage to soothe him as well.

Raphael could feel the boy's life slip through his fingers and drain from his body just as he was stepping onto the ground of the Institue. His enhanced hearing recognised the alarm go off inside of the building and he keen somebody would rush outside in a few moments but his whole focus was on the body in his arm, slowly going slack while inevitably losing the fight. He didn't stop humming the song until the last breath had left Simon's lips and before the door of the Institute burst open, he mumbled a short prayer into the night.

> `God our Father`  
>  `Your power brings us to birth,`  
>  `Your providence guides our lives,`  
>  `And by Your command we return to dust.`

He looked up to see the Shadowhunter approaching and straightened his shoulders, pushing the heavy feelings settling his chest aside to be able and wipe his face of any emotion before stepping out of the shadows with Simon's now lifeless body protectively cradled to his chest.

**Author's Note:**

>  _Por qué vuelves, estúpido mundano_ \- Why did you return, stupid mundane


End file.
